Sat in a car in a car park in the rain and needing to go for a wee but the toilet is a few minutes away and I don't… https://t.co/hQTNB36Ipo —
20 hours 41 min ago
When downstairs to feeds the cats, shut the door to keep dogs out. Came upstairs and sat on the sofa. In a puddle o… https://t.co/dSIvMeYcVM —
1 day 17 hours ago
@The_X_Stitcher It's a trap to get people to touch the toaster after use. In the same way that a wet paint sign wil… https://t.co/hE3W18mjYI —
3 days 1 hour ago
Just driving 182 miles. I thought my foot had gone to sleep for the last 50 as it was had gone cold. Turns out the… https://t.co/Wuewf1WtJ6 —
3 days 23 hours ago
RT @tokyosexwhale: 24 HOUR COMPETITION! I have THREE Teeny-Tiny Burton Batmobile test-prints to give away. Just RT and Follow and I'll… https://t.co/sD3tp7yhfo —
4 days 6 hours ago
I'm on the radio! Say hi and I'll say hi back. Come on now, don't be shy!
https://t.co/f4iwtAzSde —
4 days 18 hours ago
I'll be on the radio in about an hour. So you've plenty of time to get ready*
* see what's on telly tonight —
4 days 19 hours ago
